It has been SUCH a crazy week. Like, I don't even know where to start. I guess I'll just start at the beginning? Monday?? Just a heads up, the beginning of this email is sorta sad. But there's happiness on the horizon :)
Long story short, the headaches have not gone away. My jaw has been SUPER tight and painful. My ear is beginning to hurt again. I've been getting like really weak and shaky at the most random times? The worst thing is that I have no idea what are causing all of these physical issues. It was especially bad on Tuesday. I threw up that morning, so I basically just took the day off. That was like so hard. I hate being incapacitated and not being able to work.
All of these physical symptoms of stress are really getting me down. I do think that's what it is in its entirety: Just stress and anxiety. I've been really stressed recently, for various reasons. These symptoms I've been experiencing remind me a lot of how I felt before my mission, just on a higher level. I called Sister Bednar on Monday, and she referred me to a retired doctor/senior missionary who I talked to on the phone. She thinks that what I have is something called TMJ?? It is a jaw condition that stems from stress. I can't remember what it stands for, but basically I've been grinding my teeth and causing too much stress on my jaw and it's causing me to have headaches. Which inevitably makes me more stressed. It's like an endless cycle. I wouldn't be surprised if I have another ear infection as well, since the jaw and ear are connected. The doctor woman set a doctor's appointment for me, which will be on Thursday. Happy birthday to me, right?? She also wants me to start talking to the Waterbury's, a senior missionary couple who are responsible for the mental and emotional welfare of the missionaries in my mission. I guess it'll be like a counseling session?? They will help me find out what the source of the stress is, that way we can address it and find a solution.
I guess I'm just getting really discouraged. I don't like being sick. I don't like being stressed. I don't really want to receive counseling sessions. I'm going to get my money's worth out of this doctor's appointment on Thursday. I hope that whatever the problem is, we'll figure it out quickly so I can continue working and have peace of mind. So yeah. If Thursday could just come a bit quicker, that'd be great.
I know I've undoubtedly scared you a little bit. Or A LOT. But the fact of the matter is, it'll pass. I know that I can get through this. We'll figure it out. The doctor will know exactly how to address my concerns. It says in my patriarchal blessing that I will be healthy throughout my life, according to my righteousness. I'll be okay. Sending you all of this information is like really hard for me. I don't want you to worry too much or anything. I'll be a better missionary, a better person, because of these trials. :)
OKAY. The depressing part is over. Other than all of this sickness that I've been experiencing, this has actually been a GREAT week. Stephanie and Tyler were married and baptized on Saturday!! I want to talk about THAT in detail.
They were married at 9am and baptized at 10am. Isn't that just CRAZY?? They were married in the chapel, with only the missionaries from our district and a couple of family and friends with them. The love that Stephanie and Tyler have for each other is so apparent, it was adorable. Stephanie, one of the toughest women I've ever met, actually started tearing up. Seeing them up there, I felt like I was watching my own kids, which is RIDICULOUS, but that's legit the only way I can describe it.
The baptism came immediately afterwards. I was so dang nervous. You know I've never baptized anyone before, and I was going first. I started saying the baptismal prayer, but stopped halfway through because I couldn't remember how it ended lol. Fortunately, I managed to remember it pretty quickly. AND I BAPTIZED HER. AND IT WAS AMAZING. And then we got out of the font, and watched her new husband be baptized by Elder Marcum. It was GLORIOUS.
This marriage and baptism were like the highlight of my mission so far. I am just so full of love for Stephanie and Tyler and their children. I'm so grateful that they made this decision to be baptized and come unto Christ. They're like the nicest people EVER. Everybody in the ward loves them. This gospel will be such a blessing to them and their family. Their kids, Liliana and Jaydon will reared in a home with the gospel. This right here?? THIS is what missionary work is all about. I'm undoubtedly going to remember this feeling for the rest of my life.
The best part?? We get to do it all again this Saturday with Carolina!! She passed her baptismal interview this last Friday, and could not be more excited to be baptized. :) She was at Stephanie and Tyler's baptism on Saturday and told us that she could feel the Spirit SO strongly. She told us we looked like angels in the font. She is the sweetest woman ever. Hot dang. I am so lucky to be experiencing all of these wonderful things at the start of my mission. I thank God every day for allowing me to be here in Lewisberry. Even if it is hard sometimes.
OKAY. This has been one of the weirdest weeks EVER. I started typing out the whole story, but there's just so much that goes into it. I'll just tell you the shortened version.
Long story short?? The sister missionaries that serve in my ward think they have a stalker. They were freaking out. They didn't want to go back to their apartment for fear that the stalker knew where they lived. So they called the mission president and told him the problem. His solution?? To have them come stay in our apartment, while we went to go sleep with the Elders in the Camp Hill area. So yeah. I had sisters sleeping in my bed last night. That was a weird thought.
Fortunately this is all happening right around transfer time. So they are going to be taking the sisters out of the Lewisberry area, and putting Elders in. This is going to be SUCH a crazy transfer, for so many reasons. I wish I could put all of it into words, but this is just going to have to be one of those crazy stories I tell you after my mission. But these next few days are going to be interesting, to say the least.
Thanks so much for the birthday wishes! I always tell people I'm 19, because I legit think that I'm 19 half the time. Then I remember that I'm still 18 and it's a bit of a slap in the face. But now I'll be able to tell people that I'm 19 and it'll actually be true haha. So that'll be cool haha.
As usual, I have so much more I'd like to say, but my thumbs don't have enough willpower. Like I said before, don't worry about me. It's just been a rough week. But what is it that Grandpa always used to say?? Things always have a way of working out. And they will.
I love you mom. Sorry I didn't get a chance to respond to the main part of your email. I just had so much I needed to tell you. You're always in my prayers. :)
Elder Gonzales
1) We're dorks. P Days are fun.
2)Doing missionary work, one wrong number at a time.
3)Stephanie and Tyler, right after their wedding. They were baptized like a half hour after this picture was taken. A wedding and a baptism on the SAME day. Isn't that just CRAZY??
4)The fruit of our labors. Legitimately one of the happiest moments of my life.
